| Tuesday, June 10, 2008 |
| BLAH BLAH |
Life has its ups and downs and is never fair. Reality speaks and it really hurts. Sometimes the more you try to become a better individual chances are you are more subjected to life’s trials and tribulation just to test on your resiliency and character. Some people still keep the faith and continue believing that this too shall pass and better things are yet to come but for some they become skeptical and started to ask the million-dollar question… Why Me???
Lately, I’ve been through a lot and it’s killing the hopeful side of me. At first, I took it as a challenge. I don’t easily give up; I can come up with one hundred and one reasons to ignore all the distractions and detractors. I can be the “Deadma Queen” and continue chanting, “this too shall pass” “ its okay, you’re doing great” I am good at motivating myself. But when reality hit me face to face… I am no longer okay and I am not doing great. I am not needed here. This is where I asked that question. WHY? I came up with a simple answer… it is because it’s ME. “Mahirap maging ako” is the usual dialogue of my husband and I am now borrowing his tagline. For some reasons, some people do not like me no matter what and this is where the saying you cannot please everybody applies. And this is the reality, unfortunately, they don't like me and whether I do good or not, they dont actually care.
I believe some people are born lucky, but my husband says otherwise. He said that we make our own luck while I reasoned out that some are lucky because they can easily get what they wanted without any laborious exertion of effort (exaggerated, hahaha) and I envy them. My husband says I am luckier because I get things I wanted without asking a favor or a help of anybod. Just pure hard work. He even says it is more fulfilling. Well, I am not speaking of fulfillment; I am purely referring to luck just like the lotto winners. But maybe he was right, I maybe lucky to be ME. I am lucky enough that from these experiences I had the chance to practice the virtue of patience and optimism. Lucky enough to still fall under the category of hopefuls and managed to keep my faith undiluted.
Here I go again, trying to enumerate the next one hundred reasons why I need to move forward. After all my woes and struggle I am still trying to end my day right for me not to feel depressed. This is my constant battle, trying win over the negative forces of nature by way of believing that this is just a phase. Giving up is not the best escape. This too shall pass and my time will come. As to when? Soon. |
posted by pearli @ Tuesday, June 10, 2008  |
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Name: pearli
Home: Philippines
About Me: wife, driven. master of multi tasking, fun and loving, sweet and innocent.
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